Dick Cheney Demands One MILLION Dollars

Washington, DC -

Dick Cheney demanded earlier today that he will blow up the entire world using the weapons of mass destruction found in Iraq, unless we paid him 1 million dollars. This threat comes after harsh criticism of Haliburton's contracts for the rebuilding of Iraq.

"We have the weapons of mass destruction", said Cheney in an interview Tuesday, "and we're prepared to use them if you do not pay me the 1 million dollars that I want for my evil plan!"

Cheney evil plans consist of two parts. One of the parts is to use the money from this threat to construct a clone of himself, so he can create twice the evil, all of the time. (See below)

The second part of the plan was to create a weapon so powerful, that it would destroy anything in it's path. Cheney's ultimate goal is to be the unchalleneged ruler of the planet with an army of "mini-dicks".

"My ultimate goal is to be the unchalleneged ruler of the planet with an army of 'mini-dicks'", announced Cheney, "and each one will be smaller and more evil than the one before it. You will rue the day that you crossed Dr. Cheney P.H.Dick!!"

Dr. Cheney has not specified all of the destructive things that he will do with his weapon, but we at PaperSoup have made an artists rendering of what he could do (See below)