PaperSoup's Pick Up Lines

PaperSoup's Solid Gold Pick Up Lines: one panty ripping pick up line for every color in the girl-rainbow.


To the nature girl: What are you doing out in the daylight? I thought foxes were nocturnal.

To the girly-girl: I see someone used their leave-in conditioner today. Rowr!

To the low self esteem girl: If I were a date rapist, you'd be roofie-worth.

To the big girl: I will take you to new and exciting places, where you will eat chocolates the purity of which you will scarcely believe.

To daddy's girl: I want to f-ck you my little button nosed sexpot.

To the emphysema girl: You're like a cigarette; slim, white, and highly addictive

To the suicide girl: Hey, I've got a swell idea! Let's cut ourselves!!

To the bartender girl: Don't worry about me. Unlike some of your other inebriated clients, I can't pee into a bottle. Not because I don't want to, just because I can't fit.

To the Jewish girl: Hey, is that a genuine Louis Vuitton handbag you're holding? I sell those!!

To the horse girl: Darn! This old gimpy knee is acting up again….old polo injury. It was my fault really; magnificent creature….he just couldn't be tamed…..

To the WASPy girl: I'd like to lay you down by the fireplace and make love to you in a cold and distant manner.

To every girl: (In the style of the Saturday Night Live cheerleaders)
I said someone packed that junk in the trunk - real tight, real tight!
I said someone packed that junk in the trunk - real tight, real tight!
Uh huh! Uh huh! Uh huh uh huh uh huh!
(Editor's note: Bob like a chicken right near the ass while doing this. Otherwise it won't work.)